Ladies and Genitals! Welcome to our landmark 20th episode, where we roll out the red napkin for our Little Blue Planet’s newest nation state, Barbados!

Barbados might be too short in the tooth to hate, but there’s still plenty of spite to go around for ham wipers, mother tuckers and butt flickers. “I for one don’t like the taste of the butt,” sound engineer Pauly from Bali assures us. “That would be the cigarette butt,” co-host Arik clarifies. “I think.”

Carla from Burnt Korn, Alabama, regales all with an epic, road trip tale of porcine schmear. Then cohost Arik goes off on all his dead social media friends—who apparently can’t be bothered to RSVP to parties anymore. Pauly from Bali suggests a cremation button to bid the virtual deceased adieu.

Team THN next exposes a capitalist cabal to dip humanity in chocolate from one end of the calendar to the other. “We already have chocolate crosses. It’s just a matter of time before they start foisting Dr. King candies at us!”

Finally, Pauly from Bali declares that the fat man in the suit and the sneaky, egg-loving rabbit have had their moment.

Let’s just celebrate Kwanzaa from now on. If we do, the world will finally be safe from confectionary overlords and auto dealership clearance sales.

—

This episode is sponsored by

· Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast.

https://anchor.fm/app

Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thehatenapkin/support