Co-host Arik and Carla from Burnt Corn, Alabama, get all intimate, as they find themselves without co-host Garrett and sound engineer Pauly from Bali. Still, they ride about the lands of hate in Lady Godiva fashion (only, thankfully, with clothes).

Things begin with a letter from Tom in Bucyrus, Kansas, who pleads for the masses to take full advantage of the inventions of soap and deodorant. This inspires a days gone by tale from Arik of one famous Tinsel Town actor who once (allegedly) turned the Big Apple skanky rotten to its core.

Also, Thanksgiving is fast approaching! Let’s add the insanity of Black Friday shopping to our turkey and sweet potato-stained napkins. To restore some balance to the holiday, the THN crew suggests we let loose man-eating carnivores in the parking lots of Best Buy and Walmart on Thanksgiving night.

Also making the Hate Napkin this week is the scam of class picture day. And junk mail! Karla shows off her junk drawer, stuffed with useless snail mail from AARP. Arik’s junk drawer is filled with expired condoms. Also, why the hell is Demi Lovato calling for the cancelling of E.T. and all his phone-home alien buddies?

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