Category: Episodes

Why hate anal leakage, when you can despise dry heaving? So says freshly sober co-host Arik, who starts to confess that he’s an—when he’s interrupted by sound engineer Pauly from Bali, who hates public confessions from guilty Catholics.

Next, Carla from Burt Korn, Alabama, reads an uproarious letter from listener Brenda in Kalamazoo, Michigan. Brenda’s detestation of camouflage clothing leads the THN gang on a rant of camo couture idiocy, from ladies at the Walmart donning pink fatigues to camo-capped rednecks driving land yachts. Also, all these desert wars have simply ruined the jungle camo industry!

Arik shows off his Japanese yukata and laments that there are no Caucasian kaftans or other kinds of flowing male dresswear. Carla and Pauly suggest that Arik don a cassock and take advantage of priestly discounts on dry cleaning and lattes. Arik wishes the U.S. fashion industry would create a full-length wifebeater.

Finally, Pauly stuns all with a glorious denunciation of THE WEBINAR!

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Folks, we don’t need the Ws! Co-host Arik is steaming mad at the 23rd letter of the alphabet—especially when it comes to Al Gore’s most famous invention. Sound engineer Pauly from Bali nearly lands himself in the THN penalty box for venturing into political territory. Finally, it’s not a double-U. It’s a double-V!

Carla from Burnt Korn, Alabama, promises not to use any “ords” that use that letter. Also, she can’t stand hair bows on bald babies. Pauly from Bali is shocked, “Wait, those aren’t all cancer babies?”

Hmm. Did Art Garfunkel once allegedly refuse to pay his hospital parking fee, and allegedly destroy a parking arm gate with his sportscar? Everyone, sing along! “Are you going to pay your fare?”

Directionally-challenged Carla is sick of traffic circles. She can’t stand it when her GPS, Mildred, tells her, “Get off two quarter-circles ago, dummy!” Arik agrees, and recounts a traffic circle horror story from a failed honeymoon in Ireland.

Finally, Arik doesn’t hate dogs. Then again, he does hate animals that eat themselves to death. “Does that include humans?” Carla wonders. What’s even worse are cats that treat gourmet kitty food like litter box pellets. But nothing is lower than vegans who try to convert cats into vegetarians!

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This episode is sponsored by

· Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast.

https://anchor.fm/app

Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/thehatenapkin/support